The problem with profiles...

I always did well with sugar. I never truly had to wait long to find another SD, and I never had much trouble finding potentials. Honestly until I joined the blog over at SA, I never really knew that anyone found it difficult at all.


Turns out, most do.

Naturally I tried to figure out why. Over the years I have come up with Two explanations.

First of all I believe there's a  cultural difference between the gay and straight community regarding 'Sugar'. 

While the term 'Sugar' is still fairly new to the gay community, the idea of having a "kept companion" goes back for centuries. Read your history. A large number of the artists and musicians of the renaissance period were.. 

A. - Gay, 

B. - Had a 'kept man'.

I think it was simply our own way of having a marriage when marriage wasn't an option. Obviously things have changed over the years, but the idea of having a kept companion remains both widespread and fairly well accepted in the community.

Now while this may or may not be an interesting nugget of knowledge, it's also useless. You can't really do much about cultural differences. However the second factor is a different matter all together.

Most profiles suck!

Sorry. but I write ad copy for a living and I can assure you that the vast majority of profiles are not only poorly written, but he authors seem to be under the impression that they are on a conventional dating site.

Now I want to point out quickly that most members of the SA Blog "get it". I am referring to the hundreds of sugar baby profiles I've read outside of the blog. 

SB's used to routinely list their profile number on the blog so that you could read it. To look at it you only had to pull up any profile link and change the number on the end to match theirs. It wasn't a far stretch from that to realize if you just kept changing the number on the end you could randomly see as many profiles as you wanted. 

So my research began. I just started looking at profiles, one after another. I should note this little trick is absolutely useless for any other purpose, you have no search capability so the results are just random profiles of all types and from all over the world.

But just as a way to look at lots of different profiles and see how people are writing them it was quite illuminating. Roughly 5% of all profiles climbed the bar all the way to "good".  Less than one in a hundred qualified as "great". The rest waffled between "mediocre" and "terrible".

The truth is I have tons more to say on this topic, so if your interested in some concrete ways to improve your profile, stay tuned. I envision many posts on this subject to follow.....

More stuff tomorrow...

I've had a bad week with what I thought was food poisoning, but seemed to mutate into something much worse. Finally feeling better and will return to the blog tomorrow.

-RC

I wish

I wish you would take care of me,

it comes out with a sigh,

I didn't know I'd say it,

but I think I might know why.

I think I've struggled far too long,

sometimes I want to cry,

I plan the things I want to do

but they always go awry.

I feel I'm on a treadmill.

and I'll walk until I die,

I never make much progress,

no matter how I try.

I wish you would take care of me,

I would take care of you.

I'll make you feel your young again,

I'll make you feel brand new.

I'll help you to enjoy life,

and you will help me too,

we'll have our own adventures,

in fact, we'll have a few,

Life we'll be much brighter,

and will have a warmer hue,

We'll whirl around form place to place,

we'll have so much to do.

I wish you would take care of me,

I really truly do.

A Sparkling Limerick.

The last week, it went pretty well,
not perfect, but all in all swell.
While the praise did abound,
still no daddy was found,
but there's truly no reason to dwell.

As that's not the end to your quest,
cause a friend appeared from the mid-west.
You are blessed once again,
and we hope that you win,
and we certainly wish you the best

While the future of course is unknown,
There is clearly no reason to moan.
You'll one day find a dad,
and then you'll be glad,
and our hopes for you have only grown.
 

Luck of the Irish

When I was young there was an Irish family in my neighborhood. I distinctly remember one amazing thing about this family, they had the luck of the Irish.

They would talk about it a lot, and what was truly stunning is, they were right. They were without question the luckiest people I've ever met. I don't remember if a month went by that some manner of good fortune didn't befall them. It bordered on being annoying.

Over the years I've come to believe that they were lucky because they believed they were lucky. Down to the core of their beings, they knew they were lucky, they expected to be lucky, and lo and behold, they were lucky.

I don't pretend to understand the mechanism at work here, but I'm sure not the first one to notice it. Books such as "Wishcraft" or "The Secret" are simply rehashing ideas that go back for eons. To at least some extent the world is what we expect it to be. Clearly there are limitations or we'd all be lottery winners, but at the same time there is also compelling examples of people who seem to get most everything they want by either luck or shear force of will.

You probably know someone like this, I think most of us do.

I am certainly no expert on this phenomenon or how to control it, but I have had some luck in life and I also believe I've been able to spread some around. I have found time and time again that if you surround someone with a positive idea, positive things tend to happen. Also, if you believe something positive will happen to you, there is a better than average chance something will.

In fact one of the reasons I jumped on the "Be nice to..." weeks over on SA was because I believe this kind of positive reinforcement can actually help people. Or put simply: "Sometimes it works".

Sometimes it does.

Agreement

I am not your toy.

and I am not a thing.

Only disrespect me,

if you wish to feel my sting.

I have much to offer you,

and I can make you proud.

But I will not be humbled,

and I will not be bowed.

If we work together,

I will enhance your life.

but treating me unfairly,

will only bring you strife.

So let's make an agreement,

we both consider fair,

and I will treat you so well,

there'll be nothing to compare.

You'll be pleased to walk in to a room,

with me there at your side..

You will feel the eyes upon us,

you will feel a sense of pride.

Each day can be a pleasure

so good it feels like sin.

So let us work together,

and each of us will win.

Sugar Addiction

I have a sugar addiction, 

I can see it in my dreams.

It gives me crystal focus,

it both comforts and redeems.

I am seeking out my daddy

who will have some gifts to share.

He will show me how to prosper,

I will show him that I care.

I wish to be beneath his wings

and learn what I must know,

how to find my own success,

and how to make it grow.

I have a sugar addiction, 

for elegant romance,

to eat and drink the very best,

to travel and to dance.

I want to eat the finest food,

and drink the finest wine.

to go where I have never been,

and find the things that shine.

I want to use my passport,

and travel far away,

I wish to go to other lands,

and finally seize the day.

I have a sugar addiction, 

I seek what sugar brings,

I wish to live in comfort,

and know the finer things.

I want to know my bills are paid, 

and that they are on time. 

I want to know I can relax,

no mountain's left to climb.

I want to know that I am safe,

no tension to release,

I want to live in beauty,

I want to live in peace.